Monthly Archives: December 2016

claudio ranieri jose mourninho angry

The Premier League Title Sophomore Slump

 

Had a spark when you started, but now you’re just garbage – Jay-Z

Leicester City won the Premier League title last season and now they’re shit. Chelsea won the title the season before that and struggled equally in their title defence. What’s up with that? Is it coincidental or an emerging trend for the Premier League?
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Who Will Win Christmas Number One 2016?

Who Will Win Christmas Number One 2016?

Don’t slip up or get got, they’re coming for that number one spot

Every year the Christmas Number One is seen as the pinnacle of the UK Singles Chart… and every year they play the same songs on the radio. You’d be forgiven for thinking that nobody has made a decent holiday song since the 1980s.

For some reason, people actually care about what track is at number one in the charts on 25th December. It’s important to us who joins important acts like Bob the Builder in the hallowed Christmas Number One club. I’m surprised people still cared after Mr. Blobby won it in 1993. Call me a snob, but anything won by Noel Edmund’s walking sex toy is immediately devalued to me.
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Lego Audience

2016 Culture Hash Awards

 

We’re on award tour with Gigi my man

Jack Kavanagh and Gigi Hadid walk across the stage and take their places at the podium to scattered applause from both audience members

Culture Hash Award Show

JACK

Hello and welcome to the first annual Culture Hash Awards for outstanding boobery in the world of entertainment in 2016; the show where the awards are made up and the winners don’t matter. I am joined by my lovely co-host Gigi Hadid.

GIGI

Thanks for having me, it’s great to be here! I haven’t seen this many yellow faces since the great Jaundice epidemic of ’98!
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